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I heard a great quote this week:

“Your feeling of wealth is what you have minus what you want.”

That hit me hard because your home is on both sides of that equation.

It’s what you have. And it’s what you want.

For most people in Toronto, that house represents their biggest expense. In fact, the average household here would need to devote 73.1% of their income just to cover mortgage payments.

But here’s what I’ve learned working with clients over the years.

The problem isn’t the house itself. It’s how we value it.

People buy a home they think they want. They want to show their neighbors they’ve made it. They get into that home, settle in for a few years, then start eyeing the next one up the ladder.

More space. More pride of ownership. More whatever.

Then life shifts. Kids move out. You get older. Suddenly you need less space, but you value different things.

Time. Freedom. Flexibility.

The realization comes late. That house you stretched for? It was wrongly placed value from the start.

Most people do this backwards.

They fall in love with a house first. Then they figure out if they can afford it.

By the time someone sits across from me excited about a property, the emotional decision is already made. My job becomes damage control.

So I flipped the process.

We do the financial side first. Before anyone looks at a single listing.

I build out a detailed budget for every client. Here’s what it takes financially to purchase this home. Here’s the total cash you’ll need. Here’s the realistic monthly carrying cost when you factor in mortgage, maintenance, utilities, insurance, property tax.

Then we plug that into a lifestyle budget.

What percentage of your income does this represent? Where will you sacrifice to make this work?

This creates guardrails. Not restrictions. Guardrails that show you where you can push safely without trapping yourself financially.

Because right now, 59% of Canadians are sacrificing basic needs like food and essentials just to afford their housing costs.

That’s not wealth. That’s a trap.

The shift happens when clients see their percentage.

When they realize that dream house means 40%, 50%, sometimes 60% of their income locked into one asset.

Every dollar in that bigger house is a dollar that can’t go toward paying down high-interest debt faster. Building a real safety net. Investing back into your business. Taking a career risk that could change everything.

Your mortgage payment doesn’t sit still. It ripples.

The family who chose the 3-bedroom instead of stretching for the 4-bedroom with the finished basement? They cleared their line of credit in half the time.

The couple who stayed in their starter home two extra years? They built an emergency fund that actually let them sleep at night.

Take $800 extra per month. Over five years, that’s $48,000 in freed-up cash flow.

That’s the difference between staying stuck and having options. Between white-knuckling every business decision and having breathing room to take smart risks.

I’m not suggesting you live in a shoebox or sacrifice what actually matters.

I’m saying know the real cost.

Because when you right-size your housing, you’re not just saving money. You’re buying back time.

Retirement comes years earlier. Debt disappears faster. Career pivots become possible instead of terrifying.

Later in life, you’ll value freedom more than square footage. You’ll value flexibility more than impressing neighbors.

Why not make that decision now, when it compounds across everything else in your financial life?

Most people make housing decisions based on “how much can the bank approve me for?”

The better question is “what keeps me moving fast?”

Your home should give you room to move. On everything else.

If this topic hits home and you want to dive deeper, I’m hosting an in-person First Time Buyer Seminar on October 22.

We’ll cover mortgages, budgeting, and the current market — in plain English, over a drink.